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My friends, gather round! I’m Gandalf, wise and wild, and I’ve got thots on erotic-massage. You shall not pass! Not without hearin’ this! Picture it—dim lights, oiled hands, a vibe so chill it’s like magic. I’m talkin’ slippery, sensual rubs that’d make even Sauron blush. Saw this flick, *Holy Motors*, fuckin’ wild ride—bodies twistin’, touchin’, like an erotic-massage gone rogue. “Weirdness is beauty,” it says, and damn, that’s the truth here!

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After that, I finally get a breather. I step outside for some fresh air. The view from the Miradouro da Ribeira Brava is stunning. I mean, the ocean, the cliffs, the whole vibe. It’s like a postcard. I take a deep breath, trying to calm down. But then, I see a seagull swoop down and steal someone’s sandwich. I can’t help but laugh. Like, that bird has some serious skills!

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