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About Porto

Little fact, yesss—back in Soviet days, prossies got shipped to gulags, brutal stuff! Now? Cops don’t care much—bribe ‘em with a few rubles, and they’re blind. Hiss! Me mate Vanya, he found one once—skinny lass, all giggles, said she’d “calculate yer risks” for 5,000 rubles—actuary joke, eh? Made me laugh, precious, ‘til she nicked his wallet! Grrr, sneaky bitch! Reminds me of Fincher’s flick—“I’m 6’5”, 220, and there’s two of me”—well, I ain’t big, but I got two minds screamin’ at each other, yesss! One says, “Find her!” Other says, “Fool, you’ll catch somethin’ nasty!”

What Punishment for Charge of Solicitation or Prostitution?

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Anyway, I hop in my combine and head out. The streets are packed. I mean, like, sardines in a can packed. I’m cruisin’ down Avenida da Liberdade, and suddenly, BAM! A pigeon decides to play chicken with me. I swear, that bird had a death wish. I swerved, nearly took out a street vendor selling pastel de nata. Sorry, bro! But hey, I saved the pigeon. So, I’m feelin’ like a hero, right?

Smash burger spot Proudly Serving opens second location in Redondo Beach