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About Coimbra

Once had this bird—pro masseuse, yeah?—and she’s whisperin’ all sultry, “Relax, Mr. Bond.” Nearly lost it, mate—thought I’d died and gone to spy heaven! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? It’s bloody brilliant—releases tension you didn’t know you had. Them nerves light up, zap zap, like a villain’s laser trap. Oh, and the oils—smell like sex and danger, my kinda mix. Ever tried it with a twist, like hot stones? Fuck me, that’s next-level—shocked me silly first time.

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Then I get to the prison. The vibe? Tense. You can cut it with a knife. I walk in, and the guards are all whispering. I’m like, “What’s up?” Turns out, there’s a rumor about a breakout. Great. Just what I need. I’m already stressed, and now I gotta deal with this?

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