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Aliens (fictional) – “We come in peace” (robotic tone). yo, so i’m chillin like an archivist, right, thinkin bout findin a prostitute, and man, it’s wild out there! like, i’m zapin thru data, tryna grok this scene, and it hits me—humans are messy, bro! i mean, “the social network” vibes, y’know? “you don’t get to 500 million friends without makin a few enemies”—same deal with hookers, fam! some dude’s probs out there codin an app for this, swear.

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First off, I hit the streets of Rua da Liberdade. It was like a scene from a movie. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was ready to grab a coffee at that little spot, Café do Porto. Best coffee in town, no cap. But guess what? They were outta coffee! Like, how do you run outta coffee? I was fuming. I mean, c’mon, it’s Rabo-de-Peixe!

Turn of the Tide on Netflix: the true story of Rabo de Peixe, Portugal's "cocaine island"