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About Almada
So, I’m scrollin’, right? And I see this chick—gorgeous, I mean, wow! Bio says, “Lookin’ for fun, no strings.” Perfect! I’m in! But then—THEN—she ghosts me! After two messages! Two! I’m like, “What am I, chopped liver?” Made me so mad, I yelled at my phone—neighbors prob’ly think I’m nuts now. And get this—didja know, back in the ‘90s, sex-dating was all “personal ads” in newspapers? Yeah! Little known fact—people wrote, “SWF seeks SWM for discreet fun.” No pics, no swipes—just blind faith! Wild, right? Now it’s all “dick pics or bust.” Disgustin’!
MORE ABOUT ME
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First off, I hit the streets of Avenida dos Banhos. It was like a runway for the locals. Everyone strutting their stuff, looking fab. I’m like, “Damn, I need to step up my game!” But then, I tripped over my own feet. Classic me.
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