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About Funchal

Lemme tell ya, escorts ain’t all glitz. Some are pros – classy, sassy, runnin’ it like a biz. Others? Total trainwrecks. Reminds me of that movie line, “You’re late, it’s already done!” – ‘cause half the time, they’re rushin’ into gigs blind. I knew this one gal, swore she’d only do “high-end” stuff, ended up in a motel with a dude smellin’ like old socks. Laughed my ass off when she told me – tragic but hilarious!

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Pattaya’s offers all sorts of companionship and sex services. From the usual girlfriend experience to the sugar relationship to the rental wife material. There is an estimated sex workers .

And then, this old lady, she looks at me and says, “You should’ve brought an umbrella, dear.” I’m like, “Thanks, Captain Obvious!” But she just chuckles. I love the people here. They’re so warm, even when it’s pouring.

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