Emma Oliveira Do Bairro Erotic Massage ❤️❤️❤️

About Lisbon

Lemme drop some real talk—erotic-massage been around forever, yo. Back in ancient China, they was doin’ this shit, callin’ it “tuina” or somethin’, but sneaky-like, they’d get freaky with it. Little known fact, right? Bet ya didn’t know that! Makes me happy as fuck thinkin’ ‘bout them old-school playas gettin’ loose. But yo, what pisses me off? These fake-ass “massage parlors” out here—gimme a break, man, they ain’t real! Just cash grabs, no soul, no finesse.

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Miguel calls. He’s at the market on Rua 25 de Abril, and he’s freaking out. Apparently, he dropped his phone in a fish tank. Like, who does that? I’m dying laughing, but he’s all serious. “Help me, man!” So, I’m like, “Dude, just get a new one!” But he’s convinced he can save it. Good luck with that, Miguel.

Video: Cyclists brawl midway through stage on the Volta a Portugal 2014