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About Porto

Now, lemme tie this to *Timbuktu*—you seen it? My fave flick, hands down, Abderrahmane Sissako’s a genius. That line, “The cattle roam free,” hits me—erotic-massage is like that, wild, untamed, roamin’ where it wants! Ain’t no rules in the desert, just vibes, and that’s what I love ‘bout a good rubdown. Gets ya free, loose, like them cows kickin’ sand. But here’s a kicker—did ya know erotic-massage goes back centuries? Ancient Egypt, yeah, Cleopatra’s girls were kneadin’ nobles with oils smellin’ like lotus and lust—true story, look it up!

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So, I’m trying to calm her down, but she’s all like, “My Tico! My precious Tico!” I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s just a cat!” But you know how it is. You can’t just say that. So, I’m digging through the marigolds, and there he is, all smug and fluffy. I pull him out, and he looks at me like, “What’s the big deal?” I hand him back, and Mrs. P is all teary-eyed. I’m like, “Great, now I’m a cat hero.”

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