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What pisses me off? The hype. They sell it like it’s magic—fix your soul, your sex life, whatever. Bullshit. It’s just hands, oil, and some poor sucker—me—overthinking it. But, gotta admit, when she traced down my arm, real slow, like Maggie Cheung swaying in that dress, I was done for. “I didn’t think you’d fall for me,” Chow says in the flick. Same here—didn’t expect to like it. Surprised? Hell yeah. Next time, I’m bringing Vicodin—double the fun. Sarcasm aside, it’s a trip worth taking, just don’t tell Cuddy. She’d never shut up about it.

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By the end of the night, I’m exhausted but happy. I walk home, takin’ in the sights of Olivais. The streets are quiet now, and I can hear the distant sound of a train on the Linha de Cintura. I think about how crazy today was. From Tico’s antics to the street performer, the food, the kid, and the blackout.

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