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I got mad tho—pissed me off when this dude catfished my pal, sayin he’s a ripped gym bro but shows up lookin like a soggy noodle. Fraud alert! Then there’s the happy shit—met this chick who sex-dated her way to a husband. Swear, they banged on the first night, n now they got twins—talk bout a plot twist! “Maybe this is happiness,” she said, n I’m like, damn, girl, you won the lottery!

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After that chaos, I decide to chill at the Jardim Municipal. It’s my favorite spot. The trees are all green, and there’s this fountain that’s super relaxing. I plop down on a bench, thinking about life. You know, the usual swineherd stuff. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my peace, and they’re ruining it! I’m like, “Can’t you take it somewhere else?” But they don’t hear me, obviously.

Alex Eala dominates opening match at 2025 Oeiras Open despite rain delays