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Met this one gal, profile said “adventurous.” Thought, hell yeah, jackpot! Took her to the woods—real date, ya know? She freaked at a squirrel—fuckin squirrel! “The wind carries whispers,” movie says—hers were screams. Dumped her ass quick. Sex-dating’s a gamble, man—sometimes ya win, mostly ya lose. Like that time I matched a guy who sent recipes—recipes!—instead of nudes. Surprised me, Clarice, fuckin delighted me! Cooked lamb with him—tasty as hell.

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So, I’m walking down Rua da Escola, right? And I see this little café. The smell of pastéis de nata hits me like a freight train. I can’t resist. I order one, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, the barista spills coffee all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, you had one job!” But hey, it’s all good. I’m still riding that pastry high.

Padre Botte House by CNLL Architects