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Little fact – you know sex-dating start 90s? First site, Match.com, boom, everyone horny online! I surprise, so old, like my cousin Bilo’s beard! I try it, chat-chat, girl say “meet now,” I go fast. She hot, we kiss, I yell, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn!” – love, yes, but also sex! Very nice!

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But then, the universe decides to throw me another curveball. I’m sitting there, minding my own business, when I see a kid running towards the water. My heart drops! I jump up, yelling, “Hey! Stop!” I sprint over, and just in time, I grab the kid before he takes a dive. Phew! The mom comes running, all panicked. I’m like, “No worries, just another day in Moscavide-e-Portela.”