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Oh, and—get this—some dude in England turned an Escort into a hot rod! Freaky custom job, blew my mind! Wish I coulda sniffed that paint job—prolly smelled like victory! Makes ya wonder, “What’s a man without his past?”—movie vibes again! Escort’s past is wild, man!

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So, I’m rushing down Rua da Liberdade, dodging tourists and their selfie sticks. Like, chill, people! It’s just a river! Anyway, I finally get to the square, and guess what? No one’s there. Just my luck. I’m standing there, looking like a lost puppy, when this old guy comes up to me. He’s got this huge grin, missing a few teeth, and he says, “You look like you need a fish!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m an ichthyologist, not a fisherman!” But he just laughs and hands me a small trout. I mean, what am I supposed to do with that?

‘Great treasure’: Boston College digitizing one-of-a-kind music book found in Portugal