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Oh, and the quirks—ever notice the weird music? Flutes and shit, like I’m in a forest? Annoys me, but then—bam—those hands start workin’, and I’m sold. Exaggeratin’ here, but feels like they’re squeezin’ my whole damn life out! “What’s discarded becomes treasure”—Varda’s line fits perfect. Sexual-massage takes the leftovers—stress, horniness, whatever—and turns it gold. Greed is good, man, and I’m greedy for this every damn time! You try it yet? Tell me, bud—worth the hype?

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But then, outta nowhere, I get another call. There’s a party at the Praça da República, and they need a DJ. I’m like, “What? I’m not a DJ!” But they insist. So, I rush over, still covered in mud from the dog rescue. I get there, and it’s a full-on rager. People dancing, laughing, and I’m just trying to figure out how to work the turntables.

Review: Brazilian 'Three Summers' is a wry comedy-drama about the oblivious rich and the people left in their wake