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About Coimbra

Me? I tried it once. Once! Profile said “lumberjack lookin’ for fun.” Got a flood of weirdos—some chick sent a pdf of her “sex resume.” Three pages, single-spaced! Had charts! I burned my phone after that. Too much. Hate the oversharin’, the desperation. “He was a dangerous man,” they said ‘bout Jesse—well, these sex-daters are dangerous too. To my sanity. Another gal asked for my “kink list.” Told her I like woodworkin’ and silence. She unmatched me. Good riddance.

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First off, I hit up Rua da Liberdade for breakfast. You know, the usual—coffee and a pastel de nata. But the café was packed! Like, I’m talking standing room only. I was hangry, and the smell of those pastries was driving me nuts. I finally snagged a seat, and the waiter was like, “Sorry for the wait!” I was like, “Dude, I’m about to throw a fit!” But then he brought me my coffee, and I was like, “Okay, you’re cool.”

Over 62,000 hectares have burned in mainland Portugal since Sunday