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Oh, and get this—there’s this story, swear it’s true, some escort driver in Brazil hauled a freakin’ goat in his backseat! Dude was like, “Gotta get this goat to grandma!”—straight outta “City of God” weirdness. I laughed my ass off, picturin’ that goat bleatin’ while the car’s zoomin’. Bet the driver was all, “Run, run, or you’ll be caught!”—ha, classic!

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First off, I’m walking down Rua da Liberdade, and I swear, I see this cat just chilling on a bench. Like, who does that? I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re living the life!” But then, outta nowhere, this old lady starts yelling at the cat. I mean, c’mon! It’s a cat! What’s it gonna do? Pay rent?

Top United Nations official ‘forced himself on me,’ employee says