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So, I’m picturin’ this—me, Larry David, needin’ an escort. Not like that, get your mind outta the gutter! I mean, like, someone to drag me through life ‘cause I’m losin’ it daily. But okay, let’s talk real escort—hired company, right? I’m fascinated, honestly. Didja know escorts go back forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em—called ‘em “hetaerae” or some crap. Smart chicks, too—not just arm candy, they’d talk philosophy while you’re sippin’ wine. Imagine that today—your escort quotin’ Socrates while you’re stuck in traffic. I’d lose my mind! “Hey, honey, less Plato, more speed!”

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So, I’m headin’ down Rua da Alegria, thinkin’ I’m the king of the world. I got my tools, my apron, and a coffee that’s hotter than my last stove. I’m feelin’ good, ya know? But then, BAM! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. Almost spill my coffee. Almost.

álvaro siza expands monastery and culture center in porto with modernist concrete courtyard