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About Queluz

I got mad once—some fella charged me $80 for a “sensual rub,” and it was just lotion and a pat! Rip-off! But when it’s good? Happy don’t cover it—surprised me how them fingers find spots I forgot I had! Like planin’ a warped board—smooths ya right out. “You’re always complaining,” like that kid in *Ten*—well, I ain’t whinin’ now, buddy! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but one gal massaged my toes—TOES—and I near hollered, “Mission accomplished!”

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First off, I hit the streets of Rua 25 de Abril. You know, the one that’s always buzzing? I’m just trying to grab a coffee at that little café, O Pão Quente. I swear, the barista was moving slower than a snail on a lazy day. I’m like, “C’mon, dude, I need caffeine!” Finally got my coffee, but it was lukewarm. Ugh!

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