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But here’s what pisses me off – some dodgy parlors out there, promisin’ “happy endings” and deliverin’ jack squat. Total con! Makes me wanna grab my Walther PPK and sort ‘em out. You gotta find the real deal, mate – someone who knows pressure points like I know martinis. Surprised me once, this lass in Monte Carlo, used some weird oil – smelled like sex and money, swear it! “Sell me this pen,” I joked, but she just smirked and kept goin’. Cheeky minx.
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First stop, Avenida da República. Traffic’s a mess, as usual. I’m sittin’ there, just chillin’, when this dude in a tiny car cuts me off. Like, bro, you really think you can squeeze in front of a tractor? I honked, of course. Gave him the ol’ “what are you thinking?” look. He just shrugged. Ugh, people!
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