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Folks, lemme tell ya somethin—erotic-massage, whew! Been an insurance agent forever, seen it all. Once had a client, big guy, claimed a “massage injury.” Slipped off the table, buck naked—bam! Broke his toe, sued the parlor. Here’s the deal… erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s sneaky, sensual, got that *zing*. Watched “Inside Out” last week—Riley’s emotions? That’s me thinkin’ bout this! Joy’s like, “Ooh, tingly!” Sadness goes, “Why’s it so pricey?”

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down Avenida da Liberdade. It’s a beautiful street, lined with trees and shops. I’m just vibing, thinking about life, when suddenly, I see this street performer. He’s juggling fire! Like, what? I’m all for creativity, but juggling fire? In Guarda? I mean, it’s not exactly Lisbon, dude. But hey, I gotta give him props. I threw him a couple of coins.

Wayra , the Third Production in the De La Guarda Trilogy, Sets New Off-Broadway Dates