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But here’s the kicker—some places, they mess it up! Cheap oil, sticky hands, no vibe—pissed me off! I’m like, “Yo, this ain’t erotic, this is a car wreck!” Gotta find the real deal, man, or it’s just a tease. Pro tip: look for peeps who know pressure points—shiatsu mixed with sexy, that’s the ticket. Little known trick—ask ‘em to hit the lower back slow, builds that fire, trust me.

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We finally sit down, and he starts talking about investing in some random crypto. I’m like, “Bro, have you even looked at the market lately?” But he’s all hyped up, and I’m just trying to keep my cool. I mean, I love a good risk, but this is Esposende, not Wall Street!

Coastal erosion putting properties at risk