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About Coimbra

First off, it ain’t all sexy vibes—don’t be fooled! Saw a bloke once, thought he’d get a happy ending, ended up with a lecture on chakra bollocks. Made me laugh so hard I nearly pissed meself—“The cartoonist doesn’t know!” like Fincher’s Zodiac, all mystery, no payoff. Still, when it’s done right? Gods, it’s magic—muscles melt, yer floatin’, happier than a dwarf with a flagon.

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From facials and massages to manicures and chemical peels, indulge the mind and body at your chosen Esmoriz spa hotel. Unwind on time. Book the best Esmoriz spa.

So, I’m chugging this bitter brew, and I’m like, “Whatever, I’ll just write some lyrics.” I found a bench near the beach, you know, by the dunes. The waves were crashing, and I was vibing. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my second pastel! I’m just sitting there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I mean, I know seagulls are thieves, but this was next level.

I Hate Models, Sara Landry, Shlømo, and Deborah De Luca lead the 17th edition of Sound Waves Festival in Portugal