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Ain’t all roses, tho—some blokes reckon it’s dirty, taboo, pah! Narrow-minded bilge rats! Surprised me, it did, how folks blush at a good knead with a happy endin’. Me fave bit? When they tease ye slow, buildin’ it up— like Amélie’s lil’ games, droppin’ crumbs o’ joy. “C’est un vrai plaisir,” she’d coo— a real pleasure, aye, and who’s Jack to argue?

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After that disaster, I needed a pick-me-up. So, I head to the park on Rua da Paz. It’s my go-to spot for chillin’. I plop down on a bench, and this cute dog runs up to me. I’m talking full-on puppy eyes. I’m petting him, and his owner comes over, all worried. “He’s friendly, don’t worry!” I’m like, “Yeah, I can tell. He’s way cooler than my day so far.”