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About Almada

Little-known fact—Romans were freaks for it. Called it “massage parlors,” but wink-wink, more than shoulders got rubbed. Kinda hilarious, right? Imagine Caesar, toga half-off, groanin’— “more oil, Lucius!” I’m crackin’ up thinkin’ ‘bout it. But real talk—it’s therapy with a kick. Gets blood flowin’, stress droppin’—better than any pill. Tho, gotta watch out—some places sketchy as hell. Had a buddy, swore he got “extras,” came back with a rash. Laughed my ass off—dude, you rolled the dice!

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Walking along Praia de Coronado, I see the waves crashing. It’s beautiful, man. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich right outta my hand! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I’m laughing and cursing at the same time. Stupid bird!

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