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About Funchal

Funny shit—whore prolly got better stories than us! Imagine her laughin’, “Y’all pay me to cry!” Sarcasm drippin’, I’m like, “True, queen, true!” Favorite line, “I’m not afraid of you!”—whore’s sayin’ that to the world, fearless. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I feel it, yo—whore’s a spirit, a ghost, a goddamn legend! Typos? Fuck it, I’m typin’ fast—w-h-o-r-e, my muse! Thoughts spinnin’, like, “She richer than me?!” Nah, but she *could* be.

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First off, I’m a violin maker, yeah? So, I’m all about that wood, strings, and sweet sounds. I head down Rua da Liberdade, and I’m just vibin’. But then, BAM! I trip over a cobblestone. Like, who even put these here? I’m pretty sure they’re out to get me. I’m cursing under my breath, but whatever, I shake it off.

Secret places in Portugal: 4 destinations for those who don’t want crowds