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I reckon it’s like *Brooklyn*, that flick I’m mad fer – y’know, Saoirse Ronan with them big eyes, leavin’ Ireland fer a new life. “I’d forgotten what this town looks like,” she says, all wistful. Escort’s got that vibe – takin’ someone away, showin’ ‘em a world they don’t wanna see. Me, I’m buzzin’ when it goes smooth, no riots, no shivs pulled. But Christ, I’ve seen screws – guards, yeah – muck it up, losin’ a prisoner in ‘63, true story! Bloke slipped his cuffs durin’ an escort to Leeds, vanished like a ghost. Warden nearly popped a vein, screamin’ bloody murder. Made me chuckle, tho – clever git.

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Then I bump into an old friend from high school. We haven’t seen each other in ages. He’s like, “Dude, remember that time we got lost in the castle?” I’m like, “Of course! We thought we were gonna die!” We laughed so hard, people were staring.

Q&A with UND Athletics Director Bill Chaves: Transformation