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Oh, and the weird shit—ever hear bout “ghosting”? Hooked up with this one guy—total stud—then poof, gone. No text, no nothin’. Felt like that scene, “Where’s the baby, Kee?”—empty, spooky. Freaked me out! But I’m Bugs, see, I bounce back. Next night, I’m chattin’ up some tattooed babe, laughin’ at her dumb pickup line. “You’re my carrot, big boy.” Ha! Cracked me up.

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So, I’m strolling down Rua da Liberdade, right? Just vibing, thinking about grabbing a pastel de nata. You know, the usual breakfast of champions. But then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. Almost face-planted right there. I’m like, “Really, Casteloes? You wanna start this way?”