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Hmm, sex-dating, a wild galaxy it is! Twisted, messy, like “Synecdoche, New York” — layers, man, layers! Me, Yoda, see it I do — tangled hearts, sweaty vibes, apps buzzing like hyperspace. “All the world’s a stage,” Kaufman says, and sex-dating? A freaky play it be! Hookups fast, no strings, yet feelings sneak — sneaky bastards they are. Do or do not, there is no try — swipe right, ya dive in, no half-assin’!

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But then, the mood shifts. I get a call from my boss. Ugh. Apparently, I messed up a report. I’m like, “Seriously? I just had the best day!” But no, I gotta fix it. So, I’m sitting there, trying to type on my phone, and it’s a disaster. I’m cursing under my breath, and the barista’s giving me weird looks.