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About Braga

Oh, and the oils – they got scents, lavender, eucalyptus, fuckin’ pine! I’m like, “What am I, a forest?” Cracked me up, but it works, relaxes ya deep. Pro tip: find a spot with dim lights, music low, none of that techno crap. Makes it feel like Anatolia’s endless night, ya dig? Sexual-massage, it’s half pleasure, half therapy – don’t tell Carm, she’d flip! What’s your take, wise guy? Try it, report back, eh? Gabagool!

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We sit outside, and I’m sipping my coffee, feeling good. Then, this old guy walks by. He’s got a cane and a hat that looks like it’s been through a war. He stops, looks at me, and says, “Son, you’re in the wrong business. You should be a comedian!” I laugh, but inside, I’m like, “Yeah, right. I can barely shear sheep without tripping over my own feet.”