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So, I’m thinkin’, escorts got that vibe – “Witness me!” they scream, struttin’ round, all glitz, no grit. Met this one chick once, swear she was straight outta the Wasteland, hair like fire, eyes that’d steal your soul – or your wallet, ha! She goes, “I’m your ride tonight,” and I’m like, “Whoa, slow down, Furiosa!” Made me laugh, made me mad – pushy as hell, but damn, she had style. Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, some escorts ran gigs outta tricked-up vans – mobile chaos, Mad Max style, no lie!

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First off, I hit the road on Rua da Liberdade. Traffic was a nightmare! Like, seriously, who decided to have a parade on a Tuesday? I mean, c’mon! I’m just trying to get to work, not join a carnival. I was stuck behind this old lady in a tiny car. She was going 20 km/h. I could’ve walked faster! I was fuming, like, “Lady, it’s not a Sunday stroll!”

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