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Heya, pal! D’oh! So, sexual-massage, huh? Man, it’s wild—like, real wild! Imagine this: sweaty hands, oils everywhere, slippery as a pig in mud. I’m thinkin’ it’s like “Mad Max: Fury Road”—all intense, revved up, engines roarin’! “What a day, what a lovely day!”—that’s me, picturin’ some steamy massage joint. Mmm… donuts. Wish they served ‘em there, tho!

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Then, I get a text from my buddy, João. He’s like, “Hey, let’s hit up that café on Rua do Mercado later.” I’m like, “Sure, but I gotta find this toy first!” So, I’m running around, and I finally find it under a desk. Miguel’s face lights up like it’s Christmas! I’m feeling like a hero, right?

Portugal's Madeira hit by forest fires