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Oi, precious! Sexual-massage, eh? Nasty, tricksy hands! Me likes it, me hates it! Rubbin’ and tuggin’, all sneaky-like. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – they don’t get it, see? It’s old, real old – them ancient Greeks, yeah, they did it! Called it “anatripsis,” fancy word, innit? Makes me giggle, them posh lads oiled up, slippin’ around! Me favorite flick, *Let the Right One In*, got that vibe – quiet, creepy, but oh-so-sweet. Like Oskar and Eli, y’know? “Be me, for a little while,” one says – that’s sexual-massage, mate! Givin’ yerself over, all tingly and weird.

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After that, I decide to take a breather. I wander down to the Parque de Boticas. Man, it’s beautiful! The trees, the flowers, the whole vibe. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. I think about how lucky I am to be in such a cool place. But then, I see a squirrel. And not just any squirrel. This dude is bold! He comes right up to me, and I’m like, “What’s up, buddy?” He snatches a chip from my bag and bolts. I’m laughing again. Boticas squirrels are savage!

Matthew Botica Obituary (2004) - Chicago, IL