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But when it works? Holy crap, it’s gold! Met this chick, Lisa, total freak in the sheets—oops, TMI! We hooked up after two days of textin, fastest score ever! I was like, “Michael, you magnificent bastard!” She even laughed at my jokes, which, let’s be real, ain’t that funny. “We must do it,” Saul’d whisper, all serious, but me? I’m just tryna Netflix and chill, ya feel?

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After finally getting past that mess, I head over to the market on Rua da Praça. I love that place! Fresh veggies, local cheese, and the best bread. I grab some pão de ló, my guilty pleasure. But then, I bump into old Maria. She’s always got some gossip. “Did you hear about the new café on Rua da Escola?” she says. I’m like, “No, but I’m all ears!” Turns out, they’ve got the best coffee in town. I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need, more caffeine!”

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