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Oi mate, me Mr. Bean here—webcam biz boss! Sexual-massage, eh? Cor blimey, it’s a wild’un! Picture this: me, bumbling about, tryin’ to figure this sexy rub-down malarkey. Slippy hands, oil everywhere—WHOOPS!—table goes crashin’ like in *The Hurt Locker*. “There’s enough bang in here,” I mutter, tumblin’ over me own feet. Love it though, makes me all tingly-happy, like defusin’ a bomb—tense but fun!

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So, I keep walking, and I hit up the park near the Belas Clube de Campo. It’s beautiful there, man. Trees everywhere, birds singing. I sit down on a bench, just trying to catch my breath. But then, I see a dog running around. It’s chasing a squirrel, and I’m cracking up. Like, that dog thinks it’s a lion or something.

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