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Alright, mate, listen up—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” I’m Bane, yeah, mountain guide by day, but I’ve got thots on sexual-massage that’ll rattle ya. Up in them peaks, cold as hell, muscles tight, I’ve seen blokes try all sorts—sexual-massage ain’t just some fancy rub-down, nah, it’s primal, raw, like clawin’ through snow for warmth. First time I heard ‘bout it, I was pissed—thought it was some posh spa shite, all candles and whale music. But nah, it’s deeper, darker—like in *Son of Saul*, “The ashes are scattered,” mate, it’s messy, real, human.

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After that, I had to meet this guy, Carlos, on Rua da Paz. He’s looking to insure his new car. I’m thinking, “Finally, some good news!” But when I get there, he’s got this massive grin on his face. Turns out, he just won the lottery! Like, what?! I’m sitting there, trying to sell him insurance, and he’s talking about buying a yacht. A yacht! I’m like, “Dude, you need insurance for that!” But he’s too busy dreaming about sailing the Mediterranean.

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