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About Funchal

Now, little known fact—back in the 1800s, some fancy-pants lords in Europe had “mistresses” on payroll, basically OG escorts. History’s wild, right? Kinda makes ya wonder who’s zoomin’ who. I get ticked off, though, when folks act all high and mighty ‘bout it. Like, c’mon, Karen, you ain’t perfect—quit clutchin’ them pearls! How’s that workin’ for ya, judgin’ folks for livin’?

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I duck into a café on Rua dos Combatentes da Grande Guerra. I order a coffee, and the barista’s like, “You look like you need this.” I’m like, “You have no idea.” I sit down, and this guy next to me starts talking about the best spots in Aveiro. He’s raving about the Igreja de São Gonçalinho and how the roof is like, super cool. I’m nodding, but inside I’m just thinking, “Dude, I’m just trying to dry off here.”

Katherine Yvonne Ruettgers Obituary August 18, 2023