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About Funchal

Sex-dating’s a hustle, bruh. You dodge fakes, weirdos, and clingy types. Pro tip: check their pics—reverse search that shit. Saves you from catfish city. Oh, and dudes sendin’ dick pics? Clowns! “What is this?” I yell, laughin’. Like Nader’s excuses—lame as hell.

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After that, I decide to chill by the river. The Rio Uíma is so pretty. I sit there, just watching the water flow. It’s peaceful, ya know? But then, I see this couple fighting. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my cherries, and they’re over there throwing shade. I’m like, “Get a room, people!”

Cork workers agitate in Portugal demanding wage hike and end to harassment