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About Lisbon

Last week, I tried it, yeah—mate hooked me up, some chick with magic hands. Walked in, dim lights, candles, I’m like, “This is nang!” She’s all, “Relax, bruv,” and I’m thinkin’, “Shit, this is better than chips and curry sauce!” Oils hit my back, warm, slippin’ everywhere—she’s workin’ it, proper slow, like Emma tracin’ Adèle’s skin, “You’re so beautiful,” I’m hearin’ in my head. Got me vexed tho—why ain’t this on the NHS? Bare injustice, fam!

Crie Amizades

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So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, the bakery on Rua da Liberdade. Best pastéis de nata ever! I grab one, and it’s still warm. I’m like, “Yesss!” But then, I spill coffee all over my shirt. Classic me. I’m standing there, looking like a mess, and the baker just laughs. Thanks, dude.

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