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So, erotic-massage, it’s sensual, steamy, gets the blood pumpin—kinda like when I saw Penny Lane dancin in that movie, ya know? I’m all, “That’s what she said!” when the masseuse oils up. Hahaha! Little known fact—did ya know ancient Greeks used erotic-massage to chill out after wrestlin naked? True story, blew my mind! I was like, “Whoa, history’s kinky!” Made me happy, thinkin bout those oily dudes relaxin.

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Then, there's the Parque do Tejo, right near the river – oh my gosh, it's almost like nature's own dating app profile pic. I mean, you got the river Tejo flowin' so smooth, it's like lovin' in slow-mo. I once sat there, just starin' at the water, thinkin' how even the river's cyphers are cooler than my ex! LOL! And lemme tell ya, if you're lucky, you catch a sunset so damn gorgeous you'll think, "How you doin'?" to nature itself.

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