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About Almada

Last week, some git in cellblock C bragged he got one—said it “freed his soul.” Bollocks! Freed his wallet, more like—cost him a pack of smokes to bribe the guard. Made me proper mad—why ain’t *I* gettin’ that deal? But then, I’m thinkin’, “Loki, you’re above this,”—burdened with glorious purpose, not grovelin’ for a rubdown. Still, I was chuffed hearin’ it—imaginin’ him squirming, all awkward. “You think you’re in charge?” I’d say, like in *Toni Erdmann*, watchin’ him melt under some lass’s thumbs.

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After that, I was like, “Okay, let’s get back to business.” I headed to the shop on Avenida da Liberdade. The owner, Ana, is a total legend. She always has the best ideas. We brainstormed for hours, and I was feeling pumped about the new collection. But then, she dropped a bombshell. “We might have to raise prices.” WHAT? I mean, I get it, but c’mon! People are already struggling.

Colourful Portuguese townhouse asks for €1.1m in Abrantes