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Favorite bit? The hagglin’. “Ten bucks,” she says. “Ten? For a god?” I scoff, all dramatic. We settle, and I’m thinkin’, “I coulda conjured gold, but where’s the fun?” Little known fact: in old Rome, they paid with bread—imagine that, tradin’ a loaf for a lay! Cracked me up, picturin’ some toga’d git barterin’. Anyway, it’s messy, it’s raw, and I’m here for it—glorious purpose, right? To stir the pot, see what bubbles up. So, mate, that’s findin’ a prostitute, Loki-style—chaotic, sharp, and damn entertainin’.

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First off, I woke up late. Like, super late. My alarm? Totally betrayed me. I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever I could find. I mean, who needs matching socks anyway? Not me! I rushed outta my apartment on Avenida de la Libertad, and let me tell ya, the streets were buzzing.

Incoming Santa Isabel mayor sues to force transition