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Quirky shit? I’d sniff ‘em out, Lecter-style. Their fear, their sweat—delish. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But picture this: bloke stumbles into camp, pants down, screamin’. “She robbed me!” he wails. I cackle—serves ya right, ya muppet. Little-known fact: some guides moonlight as pimps. Dirty secret of the peaks, innit?

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After that, I decide to hit the beach. Playa Salinas is callin’ my name! I’m thinkin’ I’ll catch some rays and chill. But nah, the waves are wild today. I’m out there tryin’ to ride ‘em, and I wipe out like a total rookie. Sand everywhere, in my hair, my shorts, even my nose! I’m laughin’ at myself, but also kinda mad. Like, c’mon, I’m a sailor! I should be better than this!

Oregon farmers, others tell U.S. Rep. Andrea Salinas about impact of federal cuts