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D’oh! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Man, it’s like Melancholia up in here—just waitin’ for the end! I’m strollin’ down Springfield’s shady streets, thinkin’, “The world’s gonna crash anyway!” You know, like Kirsten Dunst starin’ at that damn planet. I see this chick, right? Red heels, skirt shorter than Bart’s attention span—D’oh! She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m all, “Homer, don’t be a dope!” But, jeez, it’s temptin’, like a donut with sprinkles callin’ my name.

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But then, my boss, Mrs. Yamada, drops a bomb. She wants me to perform at the festival. Like, what?! I’m not ready for that! My heart’s racing. I’m thinking, “What if I trip? What if I forget my moves?” Ugh, anxiety central.

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