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Now, here’s what gets me mad—the Escort got no respect! People call it basic, boring—screw that! It wasn’t boring, it was honest! Not like these overpriced SUVs cloggin’ the roads today—billionaires should not exist, and neither should their gas-guzzlin’ monstrosities! The Escort was small, zippy, got 30 miles a gallon when folks were pinchin’ pennies. Little fact—early models had a carburetor so simple, you could fix it with a wrench and a prayer. Try that with your fancy electric crap!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, torrential downpour. Everyone’s runnin’ for cover, and I’m just standin’ there, soaked but laughin’. I mean, c’mon, it’s just water, right? I grab her hand, and we dash into a nearby café on Calle del Carmen. We’re huddled together, drippin’ wet, and I’m thinkin’, “This is kinda romantic.”

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