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Last week, saw this guy on X braggin’ ‘bout his “body count.” Fifty-two! Fifty-two! Like he’s notch-carvin’ his bedpost in 1870s Missouri. “You don’t know me, Bob,” Jesse’d say to that clown. Made me mad—dude’s out here collectin’ STDs like baseball cards. But then, okay, I laughed. Couldn’t help it. Imagined him sittin’ there, pants down, typin’ “wanna smash?” to randos. What a jackass. Humor in the stupidity, I guess.

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But guess what? The supplier’s late. Like, really late. I’m sittin’ there, tapping my foot, thinking about how I could be at the beach instead. I mean, Isabel-Segunda has some killer beaches, right? But nooo, I’m stuck in this stuffy office.

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