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So, I’m cruisin’ the streets, dodgin’ burnt-out cars, feelin’ like Theo tryna save the day. Ain’t no fancy apps for this, naw, it’s old-school—word of mouth, shady corners, and a lotta luck. Git-R-Done! Back in the day, they say hookers used to hang by docks waitin’ for sailors—little fact for ya—now it’s more like gas stations and alleys. Surprised me, man, how quick you spot ‘em if you squint right.
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Then, I decided to stroll down to the beach. Playa Guayanilla is a gem! The sun was shining, waves crashing, and I thought, “This is it!” But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my phone! I’m like, “Dude, that’s my lifeline!” I chased that bird down Calle 2, flailing my arms like a madman. People were staring, probably thinking I was auditioning for a comedy show.
5.5-magnitude earthquake hits near Puerto Rico
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