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So, check it—I knew this one escort, right? Total badass, called her “Coco.” She’d roll up smellin’ like Chanel, hair poppin’, nails sharp enough to cut glass. She told me once, “Baby, I’m the chef of this hustle!” Straight up Ratatouille vibes—mixin’ ingredients nobody else dares touch. Made me laugh so hard I snorted—her clients? Big shots, CEOs, even a dude who owned a vineyard! She’d wink and say, “I’m their little secret sauce.” Got me thinkin’, damn, she’s out here livin’—not just survivin’.

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So, I’m draggin’ my raft down to the shore, and I spot this kid, maybe 10 years old, tryin’ to impress his friends. He’s like, “Look at me!” and jumps into the water. But dude, he totally belly-flops! I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost drop my raft. Kids, man. They’re fearless.

Barceloneta residents voice fears over America's Cup rents and congestion