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What pisses me off? The fakes, mang. Girls pretendin’ they’re into you, then ghostin’ after the cash. Surprised me once—found a pro who played guitar better than me! Swear, she shredded “Black Magic Woman” while countin’ my bills—fuckin’ wild. “Her fragrance still lingered”—that’s from the movie, and yeah, her cheap perfume stuck to my jacket for days.

Lured to Germany under false pretences

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So, I’m feelin’ good, right? I head over to the beach, Playa de Boquerón. The sun’s shinin’, waves crashin’. I’m ready to dive in. But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re all takin’ selfies, and one dude drops his phone in the water. I’m like, “Bro, that’s a goner!” He’s freakin’ out, and I’m just laughin’.

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