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Gets me chuffed, tho—good sexual-massage, proper lush. Muscles chill out, but then, bam, *slaps thigh*—happy endin’ territory! Mate, I’m red-faced just thinkin’ it. Once heard this lass, right, she said it’s “therapeutic,” but I’m like, *squints, suspicious* therapeutic my arse! Got me ragin’ when they charge 50 quid for 10 minutes—daylight robbery! *shakes fist* But when it’s done right, ooh, *leans back, sighs*—like floatin’ on clouds, innit?

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So, I rush over to Plaza de Recreo. It’s packed! Gamers everywhere, like a scene from a movie. I’m talkin’ about kids, adults, even some grannies with their Switches. I’m hyped! But then, I see the line. It’s longer than the line for the bathroom at a concert. I’m like, “C’mon, people! Let’s get this show on the road!”

Fatal crash at Northeast Side intersection claims one life