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So, sex escort—bare madness, bruv! These chicas, they’re out here, slingin’ it, makin’ P’s, but it ain’t all glitz, nah. I knew this one gal, right, proper fit, called herself Sapphire—worked the streets near me old flat. She’d tell ya, cash flows quick, but danger’s closer than ya nan’s hugs. One night, she’s with this geezer—dodgy bloke, smelled like stale kebab—tries robbin’ her blind! She kicks him in the nuggets, runs off laughin’. Respect, innit! Made me proper happy, that—girl’s got guts!

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After the performance, we head down Calle Cristina. It’s a beautiful street, but man, the traffic was insane. I’m stuck in this car, and I can feel my patience wearing thin. I’m thinking, “Why can’t people drive in a straight line?” I mean, it’s not rocket science!

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